There’s nothing to see here, move along


Instead, I have decided to devote this blog to mom jeans.  Why?  Well… first, my friend Candice (funny story about Candice… we’ve been friends for years and WE’VE NEVER ACTUALLY MET!  True.  And no, we didn’t meet on posted this really wonderful video and it brought me back.

But then, it was just like the Universe was feeling Candice’s vibe, too, and I found THIS!

Jessica Momba

Jessica Momba

Listen, Jess… can I call you Jess?  I know we’ve never met, but… just cuz a baby comes bustin’ outta your box doesn’t mean you have to wear mom jeans.  They make you look dumb.

Eh, whatever.  I don’t care about Jessica Alba.  You know who else I don’t care about?  Misha Barton.  One reason I don’t care about her is that I’ve never seen the O.C.  But I do care about mom jeans.  A lot.  And I care about people NOT wearing them.  Yes, Misha Barton, I’m talking about you.


Seriously, though.  WTF ARE those things???  They’re like schpants mixed with table cloths mixed with…  HAUTE COUTURE MY ASS, OK?  That’s all I have to say about that.

And then there’s Kristen Bell.  I think the only thing I’ve ever seen Kristen Bell in is “Forgetting Sarah Marshall,” a kind of funny movie which also starred Jason Segel who, coincidentally, was in Oxford at the same time as me looking a REAL HOT MESS.  I made a point of staring him down and letting him see me laughing AT him.  I’m sure that face haunts him to this day.  Anyway, here’s Kristen Bell in her stupid fucking pants.


I have nothing left to say about all this.

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